


Desperado

by coffee666



Series: lgbta x-files [2]
Category: The X-Files
Genre: Bisexual Female Character, Bisexual Male Character, Bisexuality, Coming Out, F/M, Sexuality discussion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-10
Updated: 2016-03-10
Packaged: 2018-05-25 22:52:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6213352
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coffee666/pseuds/coffee666
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He can tell her anything, right? So that's how they get into the discussion. He never thought about coming out to her, just because he's never come out to anyone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Desperado

**Author's Note:**

> *triumphantly punches air*
> 
> I'm on tumblr @canonmulder

“I just don’t get who would buy that.” He says from his spot on floor in front of the tv.

“People.” She says sleepily. “People buy it. Why else would they have a commercial?” She’s on the bed, laying on her back with her head near the foot.

“But a blanket with sleeves? Why?”

“Looks like something you’d wear, honestly.” She yawns.

“You wanna go to bed?” he asks her.

“No, no…” she opened her eyes. “See what else is on.”

“It’s nearly two…I think only infomercials.” He says as he reached for the channel buttons on the tv.

Not only was there no remote in this hotel room, but there was only a few channels. Scully made him sit by the tv and be the designated channel surfer. He didn’t really mind. He liked staying up with her and talking.

_Why don’t you come to your senses? You’ve been out riding fences…_

“Desperado?” she opened her eyes again. “What channel is this?”

“I have no idea…” but it’s the first non-commercial channel, so he leaves it.

_You better let somebody love you._

“This song reminds me of college.” She says, rolling onto her side.

“Really?”

“Yea…I used to listen to this at Mindy’s house.”

“Who’s Mindy?” he finally gives in and breaks open the mini fridge.

“This girl…I used to know.” She sits up and opens the soda he passes her.

There’s something about the way she looks, something he can’t not get hung up on. He can’t ask her straight out though, not Scully. He’s gotta ease into it.

“So, what was Scully like back then? A geek?” he grins at her.

“Of course.” She blushes a bit. “It’s how you get ahead.”

“If we knew each other back then, do you think we could have been friends?” he asks quietly.

“What makes you say that?” she takes a drink. “You know we’re only friends now because it’s my job.” She laughs, unable to even say it with a straight face.

“Right…” he laughs too.

Something about it being so late at night makes everything funny. So they just laugh for a while. She can’t even be serious. The thought of not being his friend…it was practically laughable.

“Let’s play a game. It’ll help us stay awake.”

“What kind of game? Not a drinking game?”

“Why not? It’ll just have to be with soda, though.” He holds up his bottle in cheers.

“What are we doing?” any sort of idea of his has gotta be a strange one, but she finds herself agreeing.

“Okay so, we each say something about ourselves, and if the other person didn’t know that, then they take a drink. The goal is to get the other person drunk.”

“But it’s just soda.” She says with a grin.

“Okay, so the goal is to make the other person have to pee.”

“Okay…you go first. I need a minute to think of something.”

He’s quiet, his eyes on his drink as he thinks. Maybe this wasn’t a good idea. There was plenty about himself that she didn’t know, but he wasn’t sure what he wanted to disclose.

Of course he trusted her. It wasn’t that. There were just some things he knew couldn’t say just because she’d look at him different. He liked the way she looked at him now just fine.

He should hurry up and say something.

“I uh…didn’t kiss a girl until I was fifteen.”

“That’s not that weird.” She says after taking a drink.

“But you think it’s a little weird?”

“I guess not…” she looks as if she’s thinking. “I was I think…thirteen.”

He takes a drink and she laughs.

“No, that didn’t count. Let me go again.”

“Really trying to cheat and get me drunk?” he shifts so his back is against the foot of the bed.

“Shh, I’m thinking…” she’s quiet for a minute. “I used to have a dog named Barley that lived until after I moved away.”

He doesn’t drink but turned to crack a smile at her. “I already knew that. I saw a picture of that dog at your house one time.”

“Oh. Damn.” She shakes her head.

“I’ve never had a pet in my life.”

“What about your fish?” she asks before drinking.

“Those fish are family.” He says firmly and she laughs.

He loved making her laugh, and the late night conversations make it easy. She stops to think for a minute and he goes to rest his drink on the floor.

“…I didn’t lose my virginity until I was twenty-two.” She says quickly.

He stops, his hand still in mid-air. After a second he takes a long drink and put it back on the floor.

“I was nineteen.” He kept help but say it in an arrogant sort of way. She takes a drink and shifts a bit.

“Who was it?”

“This girl I dated for a while…It didn’t work out though.”

“Oh.”

“Yea, she said I was too good looking.” He takes a drink and she laughs again.

It’s good. It’s a good relaxed, yet intimate atmosphere. The only reason he starts to feel nervous is because of what he wants to say.

“Do…do you ever find yourself thinking about…other options?”

“What?”

“Like…you think about maybe something different with the people you date?”

“What do you mean?”

“Nothing. Never mind.” He puts his drink down and goes to change the channel on the tv.

“No, really, what is it?”

He leans closer to the screen and tries to look in thought as he flips through the few channels. He leaves it on another commercial before leaning back again.

“Nothing. Don’t worry about it.” He finishes his drink and stands up.

He feels her watching him as he tosses his drink in the garbage and goes to get on the bed. He stays on the opposite edge from her when he lays down. He turns his back to her and closes his eyes.

“Mulder.” She turns and places a hand on his shoulder.

“I’m sleeping.” His eyes are still closed.

“Mulder.”

“…What?” he tenses under the stroke of her hand along his shoulder.

“Is there something you wanna talk about?” her voice is soft and careful.

“Ahh…it’s nothing I can really talk to you about…”

Why did he even bring it up? He should have known he’d chicken out with it.

“You know you can tell me anything.” She sounds a bit offended that he’d think otherwise, and he hates that he makes her feel that way.

“I know it’s not you, it’s me.” He rolls onto his back and looks at her again. “I don’t really know how to say it. I –I don’t really know what I’m saying.”

“Mulder.” She knows it’s bullshit. She knowns him too well to let him slide on this. She can tell it’s really bugging him. Prying or not –she needed to know. Especially because it seems like he really needed to talk about it.

She shifts to slowly stoking his chest over his shirt and he begins to finally open up.

“It’s like…” he sighs. “Do you ever think you’ve been dating the wrong people?”

“Sure.” She nods. “I mean, everyone feels that way when relationship don’t work out.”

“No, I mean….like you feel like it would work out if it was someone else. Like the opposite? But you know you shouldn’t feel that way because a lot of people might think something’s wrong with you…”

“Mulder, what the heck are you talking about?” her hand stops moving and she looks at him seriously.

For someone who never censors himself --regardless of what weird thing he’s talking about, he sure seems to be beating around the bush.

“Guys, Scully.” He says in an exasperated tone. His face reddens as he continues. “What if I dated guys?”’

_“Oh!”_

She’s quiet for a minute before she smiles.

“I didn’t know you thought about that sort of thing.”

“It’s not something I advertise.” He averts his eyes and looks towards the wall. “But, you know, I haven’t really cared about dating anyone since I got into the x-files.”

“You really think that means something’s wrong with you?” she asks quietly.

“No. I don’t know.” He closed his eyes and rolled away from her again.

“Because, you know Mulder, I have a very similar experience.” When she puts her hand on him again, he leans back into it.

“You wanna date guys?” he whispers with a laugh.

“I used to date girls. I mean, gender doesn’t really matter to me.”

“Was Mindy your girlfriend?” he smiles.

“No, she really was just my friend.” She rolled her eyes before laying down next to him. He doesn’t tense, but instead rolls over to face her again. “…You really can tell me anything, you know.”

“I know. I’m sorry I didn’t think I could.”

It’s rare when they lay in the same bed like this. The silence that falls is comforting. Scully finds herself falling asleep when he speaks again.

“You know that show I’m always watching, Ancient Aliens?” he asks.

“Sadly.”

“Well, you know that guy in it…with the tall hair…”

“Yes…” she smiled.

“He’s pretty cool.”

She laughs only because that would be the guy he likes.

“Well you know that woman that lives across from me? The one with the blonde ponytail? She’s pretty hot.”

Now it’s past two in the morning and they’re both laughing. When it finally dies down they both stay like that. Just lying in bed listening to the sounds of the infomercials.

That’s not all he wants to tell her. There’s something else sitting guilty in the back of his mind, but it will just have to wait.


End file.
